Silver Threads and Golden Needles

She had hoped that the cheap blinds in the dusty hotel room would be adequate enough to hide her. However, when she saw his view dart quickly to her exact window and then remain there as though he could feel her watching him, she knew they weren’t any protection. Who was she kidding? Bulletproof layered steel could be there and he would still feel her . . . just as she would still see him.

She didn’t know what she was doing down some forgotten dirt road, in a small obscure town, hundreds of miles from a place either of them called home. He’d said it would be easier this way. A place where neither of them knew anyone but each other. She’d picked the state. North Carolina. She just liked the sound of it. He picked the town a few nights later. He said he’d bought a map, closed his eyes and pointed; but she had her doubts. Maps of North Carolina were probably hard to come by in Ohio.

She’d said she wouldn’t come. She had no intentions of meeting a strange man, whose last name she didn’t even know, in a place neither of them felt safe. He said he’d make her feel safe. And she knew he would. He already had in so many ways.

She dropped below the windowsill and hugged her knees. He looked just as she thought he would. Devastating in a non-obvious way. Someone that anyone else would pass by without a second glance, but she was destroyed inside just from the brief meeting of their eyes. She wondered if he’d knock on the door, then laughed at herself because it wasn’t his way. He would wait in the parking lot, leaning against his rental, waiting for her to come to him. Certain that she would.

She contorted her body to glance out the window again. He hadn’t moved. His stance just as it was. His gaze still focused on her window. He felt her looking again. She could tell by the way his lips lifted just slightly at the corners. This was crazy. She couldn’t go out there. She didn’t even know why she’d come this far. She’d spent eleven hours driving to cower on the stale carpet of a dingy hotel room. "I just want to look at him," she’d told herself. "Just know we’re in the same state, the same city, at the same time. That should be enough." She watched as his smile grew wider, as though he could read her thoughts.

She pulled herself off of her knees into a crouching position, her eyes still fixed on him. He mouthed something she couldn’t quite catch, then he mouthed it again. "I’m waiting." She inched her hand towards the door and placed it on the cold, brass knob. Her heart waged war with her mind as her fingers tried to decide if they were going to grasp and turn. He took one step towards her room and she let her hand drop back to her side and turned away from the window.

She slept soundly that night and two more after, then she drove home. Alone.